Something came up

*I'm writing a blog post for my brother. I just wanted to give you a heads up. A while back I decided that I wasn't going to write posts just because of the anniversaries and frankly I was beginning to be repetitive. I'm just going to write about him when something comes up. Thus the title. 

I was driving to work the other day. I got to the intersection at Casa Blanca and the 10 and my transmission slipped. I was hoping it was my tires slipping on the cattle guard. It wasn't. I got on the freeway and got it up to 70 mph, but that was it. I was trying to get as close to the office as I could. No dice. I had to stop right in front of mile marker 185. I called for roadside and began the wait. All I could think about was you. Thinking "man I really wish that Josh was here to talk to right now". And it began. The flood of memories and the thoughts of how great it would be to just have you handle it for me. Knowing that the next few days was going to be a mix of getting a quote for repairs to do my due dilligence. Looking for a new car to replace it because that was probably going to be the wise way to handle this. And dealing with a government review coming up. all while having a cold that made me just want to actually be in bed. I called Dad and Mom. I told them that this is one of those times that I wish you were here. Not because it's inconvenient to deal with all of that stuff. But because we'd be spending a few days together working it out. It would be fun. You probably could've found me a Nissan Sentra transmission for pratically free and found someone you knew that would install it for me to at least get me 50 thousand more miles. But you're not here. The hole is still there.

 In the quiet moments the last few days, all my thoughts turn to you not being here. It just sucks. I called Dad yesterday morning on my way to work to ask him his advice. He said I should upgrade and get something comfortable and more reliable. He was right. There's an odd non verbal language that happens sometimes. The knowledge that there should be a third voice in this conversation that oddly sounds like both of us on the phone. We didn't say anything about you, but we both missed you. And while all of this was going on, Jessie texted me to ask us to pray for her surgery consultation on March 25 and I started to think about how you would helping her during her fight with cancer. I could see it vividly in my mind. There wouldn't be anyone more in her corner during this time than you. I've tried to text her and not have generic keep fighting conversations with her becaue I was thinking of how you would talk to her. Giving her a little bit of a hard time. Making a little fun of her. All the while being very concerned and sincerely praying for miracles for her. And comfort and wisdom for everyone else that loves her. There have been a tremedous confluence of circumstances going on that all of us needed you to be here for. 

I found a 24 Toyota Camry. I bought it.  I'm now another car removed from the Maxima that you and I spent so much time in. Here's a link to when I wrote about that if anyone is still reading this and is interested. https://aoa4life.blogspot.com/2018/08/im-buying-used-car-and-i-hope-i-dont.html

It was actually a good experience at the Big Two Toyota in Chandler. I was in and out of there in about two hours. Walked in without a car, and left with one. There's not really a great ending to this other than I've thought about you a lot the last few days and I'm glad that I did. I just miss having you around. Go talk to Robert Duvall. He just got there the other day. I love that guy.