One Year?

My baby boy is turning one tomorrow.  It's such cliche to say the time has flown by, but that is exactly what it's done.  I remember being scared as Christa was having a hard time during labor, not knowing how best to console her.  She was such fighter.  She muscled her way through the last part of labor in order to not have to go into surgery to get Caleb out.  He never dropped, just stayed right where he was the whole time.  We had to have him in the NICU for 24 hours.  Just as a precaution.  If your baby is born with a fever, they insist on keeping him in the NICU to make sure infection doesn't set in.  The first day was rough for my wife.  She couldn't go see Caleb because she was not feeling well enough to go too far without getting dizzy and lightheaded.  It's tough when all your wife wants to do is see her new little baby, and she can't because of other circumstances.  She eventually got to see Caleb and she was already in love with him.  So was I.  We took him to our room and started trying to figure out how to be parents.  He is a lot of responsibility.  The first car ride home, the first feeding without help, the first night without much sleep, the first everything.  I didn't know if I was ever going to figure out how to be a Dad, honestly, I'm pretty sure I still haven't figured it out.  As he has grown, he is still a lot of responsibility, but he doesn't seem as fragile as he was when we first brought him home.  I was as scared as I have ever been of anything, those first few weeks.  Walking down the stairs with him took on a whole new meaning, as someone who has a little bit of a clumsy streak.  My first instinct is to always protect him from everyone and everything, but that's not what a good Dad does.  You have to slowly start the process of letting him do things on his own.  Good men never become good men because they have total protection for everyone and everything.  Good men become good men because they face the world head on and don't give in to temptation, or are afraid the world is out to get them.  Striking the balance between protecting and letting him start having independence is something I am sure that I am going to have a hard time doing every year from now on.  I have to trust that God is on our side, and I have gained enough practical experience from my parents and family/friends who have raised or are in the process of raising kids, to help Caleb become a godly, good man that shows respect.
Caleb is so sweet and funny.  He is growing at a rate that I am sure is faster than any other baby ever.  He makes me laugh a lot.  He is always happy to see me when I come home, or get him up from being asleep.  I forget about a lot of other things when I get home to him.  I love him more than any person on this planet besides his Mom.  It's been such fast year.  Happy Birthday Caleb.